Dear Juno, I am incredibly proud, for lack of a better word. I thoroughly believe that you are the very definition of why teenage pregnancy is something that should most definitely be addressed by all Americans, left or right wing in perspective. The bottom line is that it is absolutely ludicrous to enforce a sense of responsibility on the adolescents of the modern era, particularly because you and I were brought up by capitalist pigs and a corrupted culture of dogmatic ignorance that never tends to cease fire in an endless battle of who can stoop lower. Adults, particularly conservative-minded adults, think that it’s up to us teenagers to refrain from intercourse while underaged at all possible costs, and some will go as far to argue that if you’re old enough to have sex, you should be mature enough to raise a child. Well, they’re idiots, and this is why: the very people that try to enforce this type of behavior are consumers of the American media, an indestructible wall of complete and utter bullshit built to keep the public’s eyes focused on things that would keep them from getting smart about their economy, about their country, and become more cynical and harder to handle citizens (in my opinion), but that’s not the point; the point is that they are contributing, or rather endorsing, a culture that shoves sex down the throats of youths in every possible circumstance. I’m not the first to say that many modern celebrities, who some teenagers will dare consider them idols of the public eye, have a rather provocative (to say the least) way of behaving, setting examples that aren’t necessarily maladaptive but sexual and uncomforting for some people. We can’t sit back and pretend that human beings don’t have appetites, it is not only in our nature but is endorsed by the public for the sake of profit. And the people that maintain abstinence usually end up with severe issues regarding emotional functionality later in life, and have been psychologically and statistically proven to have shorter marriages due to a lack of experience. The fact that you went ahead and had sex must not be shamed but praised. Now, the fact that you didn’t plan ahead is a bit stupid. But in reality, the aspect of teenage pregnancy and unprotected sex is really not that complicated to wiggle yourself out of in the event that you do end up pregnant, as you did. I certainly wouldn’t expect you to know this, as not many people do, but if I were you, I would’ve simply miscarried the very second I found out I was pregnant. If it’s done before the size of the baby gets out of hand, it’s no big deal; think of it as a really intense experience on the toilet after too much Taco Bell. How do you miscarry? How do you do so on que? Well, most of the solutions as far as the ways to miscarry are extremely illegal to know, so I simply can’t just disclose that kind of information on the internet for the entire public to see, but I can give you an idea as to how it works. Most techniques involve fully cutting off all possible nutrition to the growing fetus, which is hard, but it shouldn’t take you too long to find a lovely concoction for this to happen. Another way to illegally miscarry is to shag again... and again... and again and again and again until you’re loosened up to the extreme; I don’t know why this works, but statistically speaking, it’s pretty effective, if you do it alongside other methods of intentional miscarriage. I can’t give out anymore information, but that is how I would have solved the situation that you were in. I’ve known people who this has worked for and it is honestly by far the least traumatic way to get rid of the child that you just can’t handle. However, in the end, I think you made a very wise decision. I’m a liberal- no, I’m actually so far left that I think I’m practically falling off of the edge, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t understand the viewpoint of most republicans who hold hostile opinions about this kind of thing. Abortion is, in all honesty, taking away the life of a human being with the potential of coming into existence, a difficult thing to grasp if you are an extreme liberal who only focuses on the autonomy of the mother, an angle that I personally think has a lot less depth to it, but makes a lot more sense to me. I think you’re allowing the baby to be born was a good decision, and not only did you bring a new life into the world, but it is confirmed that the caregiver of this new life will be responsible enough to take care of it properly, or at least we all hope so. I do not perceive you as being reckless, whimsical, hedonistic, and ignorant, but rather a common human being who made a fairly common mistake and got herself out of the situation in the most appropriate manner possible, and for that, I believe you deserve no less than utmost respect.
I am incredibly proud, for lack of a better word. I thoroughly believe that you are the very definition of why teenage pregnancy is something that should most definitely be addressed by all Americans, left or right wing in perspective. The bottom line is that it is absolutely ludicrous to enforce a sense of responsibility on the adolescents of the modern era, particularly because you and I were brought up by capitalist pigs and a corrupted culture of dogmatic ignorance that never tends to cease fire in an endless battle of who can stoop lower. Adults, particularly conservative-minded adults, think that it’s up to us teenagers to refrain from intercourse while underaged at all possible costs, and some will go as far to argue that if you’re old enough to have sex, you should be mature enough to raise a child. Well, they’re idiots, and this is why: the very people that try to enforce this type of behavior are consumers of the American media, an indestructible wall of complete and utter bullshit built to keep the public’s eyes focused on things that would keep them from getting smart about their economy, about their country, and become more cynical and harder to handle citizens (in my opinion), but that’s not the point; the point is that they are contributing, or rather endorsing, a culture that shoves sex down the throats of youths in every possible circumstance. I’m not the first to say that many modern celebrities, who some teenagers will dare consider them idols of the public eye, have a rather provocative (to say the least) way of behaving, setting examples that aren’t necessarily maladaptive but sexual and uncomforting for some people.
We can’t sit back and pretend that human beings don’t have appetites, it is not only in our nature but is endorsed by the public for the sake of profit. And the people that maintain abstinence usually end up with severe issues regarding emotional functionality later in life, and have been psychologically and statistically proven to have shorter marriages due to a lack of experience. The fact that you went ahead and had sex must not be shamed but praised.
Now, the fact that you didn’t plan ahead is a bit stupid. But in reality, the aspect of teenage pregnancy and unprotected sex is really not that complicated to wiggle yourself out of in the event that you do end up pregnant, as you did. I certainly wouldn’t expect you to know this, as not many people do, but if I were you, I would’ve simply miscarried the very second I found out I was pregnant. If it’s done before the size of the baby gets out of hand, it’s no big deal; think of it as a really intense experience on the toilet after too much Taco Bell. How do you miscarry? How do you do so on que? Well, most of the solutions as far as the ways to miscarry are extremely illegal to know, so I simply can’t just disclose that kind of information on the internet for the entire public to see, but I can give you an idea as to how it works. Most techniques involve fully cutting off all possible nutrition to the growing fetus, which is hard, but it shouldn’t take you too long to find a lovely concoction for this to happen. Another way to illegally miscarry is to shag again... and again... and again and again and again until you’re loosened up to the extreme; I don’t know why this works, but statistically speaking, it’s pretty effective, if you do it alongside other methods of intentional miscarriage. I can’t give out anymore information, but that is how I would have solved the situation that you were in. I’ve known people who this has worked for and it is honestly by far the least traumatic way to get rid of the child that you just can’t handle.
However, in the end, I think you made a very wise decision. I’m a liberal- no, I’m actually so far left that I think I’m practically falling off of the edge, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t understand the viewpoint of most republicans who hold hostile opinions about this kind of thing. Abortion is, in all honesty, taking away the life of a human being with the potential of coming into existence, a difficult thing to grasp if you are an extreme liberal who only focuses on the autonomy of the mother, an angle that I personally think has a lot less depth to it, but makes a lot more sense to me. I think you’re allowing the baby to be born was a good decision, and not only did you bring a new life into the world, but it is confirmed that the caregiver of this new life will be responsible enough to take care of it properly, or at least we all hope so. I do not perceive you as being reckless, whimsical, hedonistic, and ignorant, but rather a common human being who made a fairly common mistake and got herself out of the situation in the most appropriate manner possible, and for that, I believe you deserve no less than utmost respect.